Last week on Hush…

I present this like it’s a tv show recap… alas, not. It is a round up of the sneak peek tweets you might have missed! In 140 characters or less, in no particular order:

~*~

He blushes and she laughs like butterflies storming the room, beautiful and startling.

~*~

Nebraska unfolds as the highway ribbons its way closer to a house filled with an energy Cam once unconsciously freed himself from.

~*~

Running gives him what nothing else in his life has offered: an indescribable feeling he chases as fast and as far as his legs will take him.

~*~

The look is fleeting; just a moment and it is gone, as the focus of the room shifts toward the front. It’s nothing.

Only it’s not.

~*~

His body feels like this beautiful live thing, this glowing presence, perfectly held with Cam all around him…

~*~

He never suspected Cam could be like this, so easy in the aftermath, so open and sensual. Wren can’t remember a time he felt like that.

~*~

“I’m going to make you want things you never thought you would.”

~*~

Hopefully this book will bring you on the journey Wren and Cam go on! I can’t wait to share it with you all starting TOMORROW!!!

Hush is currently available for pre-order at Interlude Press and will be released May 19th. For a chance to win a free copy, head over here!

Book Review: Love Starved by Kate Fierro

Last week, I had the wonderful fortune to get an advanced copy of Fierro’s fantastic debut novel, Love Starved.

What I loved most about this book: it took me by surprise over and over. Is there anything more entertaining than a book that transports you, that takes turns you weren’t expecting and keeps you turning the pages because you just have to know? 

Love Starved is a story about Micah Geller, 27, a man who works in information security and lives an independent, successful, and slightly lonely life in Minneapolis. While he tells himself he isn’t lonely, and that he doesn’t need love, Fierro does an excellent job showing us that he is and does with restraint that makes us feel it. Early in the book, his friend Daphne challenges his assertions that he doesn’t need love or physical connection and gives him the name of a personal escort who specializes in creating custom fantasy scenarios for his clients.

The initial premise of the book — that Micah ends up asking Angel for one night to show him what it feels like to be loved — compelled me. This is the place where the book begins to step away from a common trope we’d be expecting in a romance about a lonely man calling an escort. How on earth was Angel going to pull this off?

I don’t want to give away the plot of the book, but I will say that this was the first of several turns the book took that elevated it from any expectations I had. I literally couldn’t put the book down — whenever I thought I could (mainly because my kids wanted to play or I had to make dinner) — I got sucked back in by a twist I didn’t see coming. It takes a great writer to pull this off effectively, while maintaining a believable chemistry and unfolding a relationship (or potential relationship).

There are many things I could praise Fierro for, but one in particular I wanted to single out: the way she handled Micah’s romantic history. It is incredibly hard to write about someone who has been burned by love without making it too cliched, too saccharine, or too expected. From the start I thought Micah’s heartbreak was going to be a story of a lost lover and longing for him. But it very much wasn’t. And what’s better, Fierro doesn’t just tell us what happened: she shows us slowly and organically. She doesn’t explicitly tell us that it Micah was emotionally manipulated or that he spent two years learning to believe that what he got — not much — was what love was, and what’s more painful, that that was the most love he could expect or deserved. Through this story, we get the privilege of watching Micah unpack this past in a natural progression that very much honors the real life work that is healing from an emotionally manipulative and painful relationship. Watching Micah learn just how much he’s worth and what love between two people can be — not just something he deserves, but something he has to give — felt like an honor.

This book is the perfect romantic read: well written, a plot that keeps you hooked, with a love story you can’t help but root for.

Also, high praise for her cover artist, who captured beautifully one of the highlights and themes of the book with her depiction of starlight behind the characters.

Love Starved is available for pre-order at the Interlude Press store, and will be released on April 21st. Order now and you’ll get the eBook bundle free with the purchase of the print book. For a chance to win a free copy of the book, enter giveaways here.

You can find Kate Fierro at Katefierro.com as well as @kate_fierro on twitter (which I recommend following, if only for her awesome daily plot bunny tweets!)

Grannie Panties and All

A few weeks ago I talked about my naturally squirrely nature. It’s no secret that I fly by the seat of my pants. So it really shouldn’t be a shock when life sneaks up and pantses me.

Of course when you’re not expecting to be pantsed, you don’t have time to put your sexy undies on. When Interlude Press contacted me last year with an offer to publish a book, I’m pretty sure I was wearing those pale pink grannie panties no one but my husband sees (and even then he averts his eyes and everyone pretends it didn’t happen).

This weird metaphor is going someplace. I think.

The point is, I had NO IDEA this was coming. It was so far off the radar. For years my radar had pretty much been stuck between “keep dreaming” and “don’t try because you’ll fail”. Maybe every 108 days that ominous beeping (that’s a reference for my fellow Losties!) obligated me to punch in a string of consonants and vowels, try to pretty them up, then sit back thinking, “never gonna get it”.

Let’s take a moment to jam out to some En Vogue. I’ll give you a second.

Anyway. I’m making myself out to sound rather pathetic, which is not my intent. The truth is that I always wanted to be published, but I lacked in self esteem and suffered from a fear of failure.

Publishing was very much a What If that depended on Some Day.  I don’t know if the universe was speaking to me, but just before Interlude came to me, two good friends of mine got publishing contracts. I was green with envy, but also, began to feel a little warmth near my bum that may have been the start of a fire being lit under it.

I might have been newly motivated to reshelf my publication dreams to another dream category (I can do this, right?), but I certainly was NOT prepared to be approached for publication. Hence, the grannie panty metaphor. In the stuff of fantasies, when someone approaches you about writing gay erotic romance, you should have a leather thong on right? You live in that thong. You breathe sex.

Uh. Suuuuuure.

Those grannie panties were a safety net. They were comfortable. They didn’t propel me into any sort of motion. As much as I wanted to do it, I had fears. I spent a few weeks thinking “there’s got to be a sneaky catch” when they approached me. I have kids and had just gone back to school. I was juggling those with a house and a husband and hardly any time to breathe. Was committing to writing a book something I could believe in myself enough to do?

But, you know, chasing a dream even when it isn’t expected or planned for is kind of a me thing to do.  Writing a novel for publication? Despite lingering apprehension, writing a novel was not only a dream, but a totally shiny thing in what was already a life in upheaval. It was time for me to gird my loins, grannie panties and all, sign a contract, and try to be brave. Make myself uncomfortable. Go on another adventure. Consider that leather thong more seriously.

Honestly, what is more important than my underthings is the fact that I finally took a chance and decided to put myself out there. Hush isn’t just sexy: I put my whole self into it. It’s layered and emotional and all mine. It’s been a crazy ride, which yes, involved lots of pantsing and a few forays into the land of “ohhh shiny object”; it’s been an adventure with a few missteps, but fucking fun as hell too. I hope you’ll take a chance on this book and let me take you on an adventure too.

I won’t promise that I took off the grannie panties while writing Hush, but we can all certainly pretend I wrote it in a negligee.

I wouldn’t want to ruin the fantasy.

Hush is currently available for pre-sale at Interlude Press.

 

Exciting Stuff

Yay WordPress!

I’ve moved on over to wordpress, which is super yay for me right now. I’m still fiddling with my widgets and blog rolls and all the like, because I am super fucking picky about details that probably no one cares about but me. I might be building a reputation for this. Oops? I am generally not at all detail oriented but for some reason webpage layouts are my kryptonite. My tumblr pages have been tweaked in their massive html codes until I go blind, and then in a few months I start to hate what I have and start over again. Although my current fan tumblr has been the same for a while. After years of searching and tweaking, I finally found something I love over there!

There’s a lot of really exciting stuff happening with my publisher, Interlude Press — new books are coming out with the new year, and I’m way excited about those. You’ll be hearing more about that as I fangirl over books I’ll be reading at release with you all!

If you’re interested, I am reading a ton of random stuff anyway — you’ll find my Goodreads info at the bottom here. I share this because I’m an avid reader who loves recommendations, and if you do too — there ya go!

Two bloggers with books coming out I’m watching avidly are KateFierro, who is doing a weekly countdown playlist of songs that inspired her book. I am a sucker for this sort of thing, as songs are pretty much always responsible for my plot bunnies. I love reading about what inspires other authors. Check her posts out! Another blogger I know is crazy inspired by music is Mimsy Hale. And if anyone is a spotify fan, the authors behind Starling and Doves, my new obsession (check them out at Avian30) have Spotify playlists for both books — which about slayed me when I listened after reading.

Also, with the release of her first original novel, Right Here Waiting, I’m enjoying K.E. Belladonne‘s blog posts of squee.

Hopefully you’ll be seeing more of me in the coming weeks — I have a lot of exciting stuff coming up personally! For now, enjoy looking into other authors who have exciting things coming up.

Redefining Win

At least, for me. 

As you may have read before, NaNo is something I look forward to all year. It’s something I have “won” seven years (my only not “win” was when I had had a baby 2 months before, and that was more of me realizing on day 2 that it wasn’t for me). Anyway. 

This year in the month of November, I had honestly so much to do, other people started asking me if I had elves in my pockets and how I managed to get any sleep. And because I have a very strict sleep schedule (sleep disorder management), and because almost 33 is too old for all-nighters, the truth is, I’ve dropped a lot of balls. 

The first to go, about 8 days ago, was NaNo. At first I was too busy to really be upset, mostly because my attention was focused on getting the second edit of my novel done, which was just a *thing* because I was really, really stuck on fixing some pacing and structure issues. And this was thing #1 of about 10.

A couple of days ago I posted on another blog that I just didn’t know if I could finish NaNo. Yesterday I was actually actively upset. I was 10k words behind and I know I am just so busy the rest of this month picking up the other balls I dropped that I could not do it. 

The other really hard factor here is that I am suffering from a lot of hand, wrist and elbow pain. It’s actually debilitating: it hurts to do everything, my fingers go numb, I can’t even hold a remote or a phone or drive a car by the end of most days. 

So yes, extra typing just felt like an insurmountable obstacle. Yesterday I decided in my heart I was just going to give up, put NaNo away and be done with it. 

And then I remembered how much I love the story I’m telling. And then I spoke to two of my very best friends and then read this post by my amazing editor and friend Annie, and they all really got me thinking. 

I can throw in the towel because I don’t believe I can get to the 50k, or I can keep plugging away and know it did my best and that I fucking rule for trying my hardest despite the number at the end. And yeah, I want to get to the 50k, if only for the sake of a winning streak and a competitive spirit I have re: myself. If I get it? Happy birthday to me. If not? Happy birthday to me. (Literally. My birthday is Dec. 1st).

Yesterday and today I managed, through crazy pain (IDK what’s wrong with me), to make it to my new daily goal to catch up (2300 words each day). I have about 90% certainty I won’t be able to write Thursday – Saturday, so I might have to define a new normal. Or write 50 words and be proud of myself. 

It’s okay. All of us who are in this crazy mix, especially those of us who are behind or swamped or just struggling — we’re fine. There was a story inside wanting to be told, and we started telling it. 

Location (AKA also a character)

As a writer, I’ve struggled a lot with the question of location. There’s a lot of the world and this country that I’ve never seen (tragically, because I *love* traveling). In the past I’ve not been much of a researcher; initially because I was writing fast and hard for NaNo and rarely went back to the books for edits. But I did place characters in cities and states that served an important purpose for the characters and stories I was building.   

I do believe that location is incredibly important to the integrity of the story being told. For me, location is almost like a third character, silent but formative. It frames your story, it supports it in the background. It breathes atmosphere and often is a part of character growth and development. 

The first story I ever really researched for a location I’d never visited had scenes in London and Paris; I could not be *less* familiar with either location. But for both these locations in both were vital to the story. 

One of the loveliest things about participating in fan culture (which is where my writing really took off and picked up speed) is that it is a *gift* culture. Which means that when you need help, have questions, or a boost, there will generally be someone there to help you out. Having had a positive experience with help from other writers re: the story that took place in Europe, I decided to send out a call for help for locations in my current novel. I got so much amazing help, and for each person who offered advice, thank you, And also, sorry because big changes had to be made that kind of cut out sections that you all helped me with (eeep).

When I began this story, I’d never been to Chicago (a fact that seems to boggle everyone’s mind, as everyone here has been there at least once. It’s only 4 hours away and there’s train and bus routes). So why Chicago then? Why not pick a location I am intimately acquainted with? (For those wondering, that knowledge would be limited to Florida, Michigan, and Ohio). 

I needed one of my characters, Wren, live in a city that was supportive of the *thing* that makes him special (we’ll reveal that in the future when we’re closer to publication) (isn’t it awesome how I’ve somehow become a magical we?) (I love parentheticals. Just submit to the insanity). Detroit? Not a city that would work in any way for this need. Other Michigan cities that support larger populations? Not necessarily what I needed either because they’re in no way what I would consider cosmopolitan (sorry!). Plus, Michigan is just too conservative for my needs. I didn’t want a huge city, such as New York, or an expected city such as San Fransisco. Chicago seemed like it might be a good fit, and in a fit of insanity, I figured I could probably travel there for some on site research. Research is fantastic, but I really would have liked to soak in the atmosphere. 

Remind me to tell you about my disastrous attempt to visit the city this past June. 

Anyway, Chicago it was. It was a good fit for Wren, but also, a very important place for my other character, Cam. 

Enter another location that I know *nothing* about: Nebraska. I’ll give that revelation a little time to simmer as you ponder just why I chose that state as Cam’s home state.

I needed Chicago to be a revelation, and I needed Nebraska to be a foil, and I needed them to support a character in the process of discovery on multiple levels. I’ll admit that I only managed to glimpse Chicago at a distance while trapped for over an hour in the worst traffic jam of my existence; this obviously really changed my plans and the way that I placed my characters and their interactions in the city — as I wrote the book, the city became very much a background character (with totally made up places). At this point, it’s more the *idea* of each location that became important. But still, I stand by my assertion that location is a vital piece of my storytelling puzzle (here and in other books I’ve written. Or sort of written. Half written?) 

Of course, I am regret and anxiety filled, so now that the manuscript is in I worry that I haven’t done enough or filled things in enough. I guess time will tell. For my writer followers, how important is location in your stories, and how do you use location? For my readers, what are your thoughts? Do you find that location is important in shaping a story or does it depend? 

Risk vs. Reward

My goal with this author blog (well one) has been to try to update at least once a week, talk about craft, get chatty about process, and as we get closer and closer to the big day, let you know more about the book. So my apologies for spectacular fail last week.

The good news, while I left a few of you hanging, assuming you are that invested, is that the reason I was MIA was because I was burning the midnight candle completing the second draft of my manuscript, just in time for a little break before I dive into a third read before my due date (8/18, so close!). There are still a couple of scenes to be written, the most important of which take place in Nebraska, a state I almost nothing about. I do have someone helping me with that part, we’re just working on coordinating schedules to really nail down details before I tackle that piece. Plus, character development wise, it gives us a really important background context and insight into why one of our main characters functions as he does throughout the novel even as he’s going through many, many changes. 

Oooh lookie! I gave you guys a little hint: nameless character has ties to Nebraska. I’m sure this leaves you salivating for more (she says sarcastically, which is really not a great look on me, I don’t pull it off well). If you looked closely at the lovely picture I tweeted the other week, you can also find some character names spoiled there. I’ll leave you to ponder with bated breath which one of them is from where. Oh! In reading an old blog post, I realize I did drop a character name, so I’ll unveil my darling Cam. I won’t tell if where he’s from though. 

I’ve been thinking, as I closed out the end of this story draft and writing out the final scenes, about what themes I could really pinpoint in this story. I am *terrible* at summarizing and boiling down and such for my own work because I can be very tied to all the nuanced details and threads that I think are so important to the story. They all seem relevant m’kay?? 

I spoke in one of my first blog posts about avian30’s Dream It, Do It challenge, and a novel theme I’d been working on: taking chances. But when I’d think about the boys I have here and their process over the almost three years their story unfolds, I realized it is not just that they need to take chances, but also weight the potential costs and benefits of taking big risks. 

In our lives, we’re often presented with choices that don’t have easy answers, no guarantees that one path will truly pan out to be the best course of action. Perhaps both seem overwhelming, or frightening, or carry the impending weight of difficult changes that must be taken. Often the cost just cannot be calculated. Maybe as we decide to travel in one direction, we’ll have to let go of something: something we’ve wanted, held dear, a perception of who we were or thought we were going to be. These are moments when taking stock of putting ourselves out there will be worth that risk, if the potential payoff will actually, you know, pay off. And then, for many of us, there’s going to be a grieving process for the thing we knew, the thing we didn’t chose; even if we perceive that we ultimately made the right choice. That’s not even to speak of times we realize that we’ve made the wrong choice.

Now I can’t tell you if these boys make the right or wrong choices throughout the book — that’s a journey I’d love for you to embark on with them. 

I would love though, to talk with you guys about times in your life when you were faced with a choice that carried risk. Did it pan out? Did it not? How did you handle that process? 

If you’d like to chat, I’d love to respond to asks and messages on the topic; anyone want to come play?

Harnessing a Tornado

Last Saturday, I joyfully went to my local Kinkos (which wasn’t actually that local) and had them print out my first draft, all the while hoping they wouldn’t stop to read it and find some serious smut. Still, a few minutes after they got my file, I was holding 170 pages of fresh printed, warm papered story. 

Of course, I didn’t think ahead to things like a binder or a three hole punch. This means I am very carefully splitting the story into two as I go through it, and praying that my three year old will not get into them (which is a high hope, because my three year old is an adorable tornado of destruction).

I’ve improvised a crazy system involving sticky notes, colored index cards, regular index cards, and multiple kinds of pens. I’m reasonably sure there is probably a more streamlined way of doing this, but it probably wouldn’t be *me*. 

I’m a little tornado myself. In many ways, a lovely, chaotic, story telling tornado. With a destroyed house I am ignoring in favor of writing this book. Oh well. Sacrifices must be made, right? 

I referred in an earlier post to my character and plot development system and said I’d be talking about it in the future, and so I thought I’d begin here. 

I wrote my first novel participating in NaNo in 2007. I had no story idea. It was November 5th I believe, so I was already behind. I was working a soul sucking, mind numbing job with truly mean people. Except for one girl, who like me, dreaded each day of work. Unlike myself, she *had* a story idea that she’d always wanted to write, but never thought she could because she wasn’t a huge reader. 

I sent her a link to the NaNo website and encouraged her to be my writing buddy. As a nice side effect, it distracted us for a bit from the horror of our jobs. 

I went into NaNo with no plan, with no idea how to write a book, how to structure it, how to develop characters. So I just made things up. I started with a moment and thought to myself, “What happens after this?” I allowed the story and characters to fall into place like dominoes. After a while, my characters started doing things I didn’t expect, and some that I’d created for background moments started to step forward to carry parts of the plot. I told myself that this is what happens when you write at a breakneck speed. Next time I write a book, I told myself, I’ll plan it out, I’ll know the characters completely, I’ll work to flesh out a completely developed plot. 

Oh god, if only I could. 

The truth is that I am a chaotic writer. I write like a flash flood, fast and hard and messy as hell. I write *through* a story, and in doing, am slowly learning to accept that I have to let the characters talk to me. That I have to allow myself to let go of plans and to trust my intuition, because, as it turns out, I am a highly intuitive writer.  Although It is often hard to trust that I’m going to get *there*, that amorphous ending point (which, after writing that first mess of a novel, I started to do — that is have an idea of how it ends, at least), it’s just how I write. And I must be doing something right: I hope that that little Interlude Press logo confirms that, if only to myself. 

For the moment’ I’ll have to leave you with that. Stay tuned for more conversation regarding character development, small hints of what is happening and who they are and how I am attempting to harness the tornado of this whole experience. I must be off though, because my kids have decided to open my storage totes to make caves for themselves. I should create a superhero persona for myself: Mommy Writer, with the power to write romance and smut, but also corral active little boys who are stuck indoors due to rain. 

I am off to find a cape then. While I do so, I’ll encourage you all to attend Interlude’s 24 Launch Party. I’ll be speaking about writing original fiction with other 2015 authors. There will be sweet giveaways. And if you want, you can register here for chances to win a free copy of my ebook when it is published! 

 

Link

On July 22nd, Interlude Press will be hosting a 24 hour launch party. Interlude Press will be hosting live chats and Q&A’s throughout the day with authors, as well as title reveals. Join us on google+ the day of to listen in, as well as to enter to win various awesome swag. I’ll be talking at 6pm with some of the other 2015 authors who are writing original fiction. 

As a part of this awesome world wide launch celebration, if you enter here (and by here I mean the lovely green box you see above) you can win a copy of my debut novel, which is slated to be published in 2015 (eeeeee!).  I am so excited to share this story with you guys, I cannot wait. 

If you are interested in checking out raffles for other IP authors, including the Grand Prize (free books for a year), you can check out more information at the Interlude website. Here is a list of who is speaking when and about what! 

Hope to see you all there with party hats and PJ’s on! 

**apparently the links to the Facebook and Goodreads weren’t working. They’ve been fixed now :D**

Win a Free Copy of my Book!